There is no why to suffering, only a how. How did it affect you? How did it change your outlook,…
Understanding Shame as the Source of Depression: How Learned Hopefulness Can Backfire
With great power comes great responsibility, the degree of which most of us can’t handle. Kennon Sheldon, one of the…
The Importance of Choosing Your Values and Why You Often Feel Stuck
Existence precedes essence, and proceeds from it. Choosing one’s own way is the only conceivable purpose of being. Yet, through…
Your Feelings Don’t Always Matter and That’s a Good Thing
Repeatedly, we’re told that feelings aren’t facts. This usually means that reality doesn’t have to acquiesce to your desires –…
Obsessed with Suffering and Striving: How Reframing My Depression Eased My Pain
An ancient proverb reads: Enlightenment isn’t wisdom; it’s the feeling of lightness. In it, one sees the contrast between striving…
My Gift of Trauma: How Childhood Abandonment Shaped Me
If trauma can become a gift, first understanding it is imperative. Left on her own, with no one to look…
Trapped in Neverland: Why Can’t I Make Decisions?
The passive observer attempts to keep all of his options in front of him. Emphasizing each of his decisions, his…
Learning How to Listen to and Tolerate Your Negative Feelings
Traumatic childhoods can cause people to attempt to flee their lives by cultivating and pursuing fantasies, or utopic lives, believing…
The Perfectionist’s Shame: Why the Difference Between Responsibility and Blame Matters
“We don’t want to become what we are. We want to become a concept, a fantasy, what we should be…
Why the Person You Love Won’t Leave an Abusive Relationship
Masochism is an often misunderstood personality concept. Many tend to think of masochism as the love of being in pain,…