No matter how brilliant and beautiful you are or become, you will never silence all of your critics. We want…
Why Psychotherapists Don’t Give Advice
People often enter treatment searching for wisdom, searching for advice that hasn’t already been given. In the popular HBO show…
How Our Philosophies of Love Become Barriers to It
“If he loves me, he’ll love me unconditionally.” “If she loves me, she’ll want to become the best version of…
Why We’re So Defensive and How to Stop
We make significant mistakes when we’re protecting ourselves. Defensiveness, self-aggrandizement, bragging, deflecting, perfectionism; whatever you want to label it, we…
When Self-Help Turns Toxic: Why We Can’t Always Be Rational
In Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, there’s a process labeled cognitive restructuring, wherein beliefs are explored in a systemic manner to confirm…
Obsessed with Status and Popularity: An Exploration of Cultural Illness
Love only matters to us if we accept it. Like Jay Gatsby, most of us find ourselves in the throes…
For When You’re Feeling Shame
Shame compounds. Of all of the negative emotions, shame is the worst. Anxiety subsides when we avert a threat. Sadness…
Being Great Isn’t That Great: The Inevitable Distorted Thinking Involved in Success and High Achievement
Why are we chronically unsatisfied? Someone close to me once told me that she wanted to have everything she wanted…
A CBT Approach to Understanding and Dealing with Anger
Anger is a threat; anger results from threats; anger is righteous; anger is destructive; anger is defensive; anger is hopeful;…
Do I Really Have to Love Myself Before I Can Love Others?: Against the Existential Ideal
Balancing what you can accomplish today with what you’ve done in the distant past is a challenging feat. All the…
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